Theories of Things: Ep.1 William Riddle
by Eowyn29
Welcome to the first ever edition of Theories of Things! As you may know, my name is Becky, and in this new shiny segment of the Quibbler, we will be going through some Gringotts vaults and I will come up with theories about how some strange items got there. You can also request people’s vaults, so if you’re not careful, your friend might’ve asked me to have a little look at your stuff...
To start us off, Griphook has taken me to Vault #0003, Mr. William Riddle himself! There were plenty of things to write about, but I liked the look of the: “Goblin-made sword with an emerald pommel." Note: I had to look up what a pommel was, and for your benefit, it’s the a rounded knob on the end of the handle of a sword/old-fashioned gun etc. But, onto the theory...
Most of you will be aware that Liam is the History of Magic professor at Hogwarts, but what if he was part of history himself? He’s the Head Goblin, and we know that Goblins play a pretty big part in history, so maybe this is why he’s qualified to teach? But, we must not forget that Goblins are also very good at forging weapons, and armour and a sword are both surely weaponry. The emerald pommel must represent his *wonderful and amazing* Hogwarts House. He obviously has a rebellious streak, because he has a DEATH EATER mask, and I’m not even going to get started on that...
After all my rambling, I have concluded the following:
Liam is a Goblin (possibly IRL) who forged his own sword and placed it in his vault. He also might be a Death Eater, but never fear, I have PMed about that and will get back to you on that. Also, for amusement purposes, I want to think he used the sword in the Battle of Hogwarts...
Also, since I’m feeling very kind, I’ll give you my Liam might be a Death Eater theory as well.
It was a warm summer day and Liam was walking home from school... He was stopped by this man as he was walking through the dark park. He was missing a nose, so obviously Liam didn’t want to ask, as that would be rude of him.
“Hello Liam,” the man said. He had a raspy voice, not unlike that of a constipated mooncalf.
“Hello sir,” Liam replied. If you hadn’t guessed, his man was Liam's father, Voldemort. Little did Liam know, Voldy had sensed that he was a wizard, a pureblood wizard for that matter, and had come to recruit him for MDEA (Mini Death Eater Academy)
Liam refused the place, but as his father left, he gave him a Death Water mask, and he still has it to this day...
LOL Corner
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Duelling Corner
by Eowyn29
Theories of Things: Ep.2 awesome_forever
For this second episode, I have decided to do the lovely miss awesome_forever's vault! Now, we all know that Navi is a bit insane, but when I looked in her vault, I was in shock! The girl has several strange items in her vault! So, obviously I had to do an article on it. Some of the weirdest stuff was given to her as presents, so naturally I couldn't do that. However, all hope was not lost! She had several strange items of clothing including: Cheese-flavoured studs, Size 0 Skinny High-waisted Totally Ripped In Acid Wash Jeans, and a Catly Hallows Tank. I thought I would give you, first of all: what on earth I think they are and the safety hazards (bearing in mind I know nothing about fashion and a lot about safety hazards) and my theories of how they got there.
The Cheese-flavoured stud earrings: When I first saw these, I thought- so the earrings are cheese-flavoured, does that mean you can eat them? I then also realized that they were a SAFETY HAZARD! Reasons the earrings are safety hazards: Don't put sharp things in your mouth! Small things could get swallowed easily! My theory: One dark and stormy night, a cheese ninja snuck into Navi's vault, attempting to steal something... Unfortunately, it had to run away quickly because one of the Goblins was doing the Anti-Cheese-Ninja-Patrol (also known as ACNP) In their haste, the Cheese-Ninja quickly jumped out the non-existent window, and their cheese stud earrings fell off! And thus ends this theory... But onto the complicated Jeans!
The Size 0, Skinny, High-waisted, Totally Ripped, In Acid Wash Jeans: The hazard is in the name. THE JEANS ARE ACID MARINATED! Also, if the jeans were totally ripped, than they might fall off, and you would be arrested for indecency. The theory: This isn't a very good theory, because there barely is one. Navi probably bought these, but I bet someone put a landmine in them because why not.
The Catly Hallows tank: The only hazard to these is probably the strange mental images I got from this top... But I have an adequate theory for this one, and it involves horcrux cats: A long time ago in a galaxy far far away [wrong fandom Becky *facepalm*] in Ancient Hogsmeade, an elderly tyrannical wizard was walking down the street. As he was walking, he felt an urge of life inside him, and wondered: why can't I live forever? This man was Herpo the Foul, the creator of the first ever horcrux. As he was having his evil surge of thoughts, he heard a cat.
"Ugh!" he said, "Why are cats so irritating?!" Due to his evil nature, he killed the cat, but the cat stayed alive. "How can this be?!" thought Herpo, but little did he know then, that he had created the first horcrux. The cat's descendants still remain alive today, but they are known as the Catly Hallows, the cat family of Horcruxes...
That's all I have for this time, but just send me a PM if you want me to do a specific vault!
Crazy Card Collections
by Lily Fey
What's the first thing that comes to your mind when I say 'Honeydukes'? For me - a very, very enthusiastic card collector - that would be Chocolate Frogs. The little Hogsmeade Shop offers one of the best sweets in the world combined with beautiful collectables. Honestly, I cannot visit Hogsmeade without ordering another ten Chocolate Frogs.
Which brings me to the question, what drives us to buying this certain type of sweet? "At first it was 'why not'," Angela states. "But I've grown to enjoy collecting chocolate frogs " June's story is similar: "Well, at first it was simply that I would have a Chocolate Frog in my vault. I love sweets, so I just bought a bunch. It felt weird though to only have three cards or so, that's why I bought a few more. Now I'm at that point where I buy the Chocolate Frogs to collect all the different cards and I'm almost finished! That's exciting!
"But pure coincidence is not everyone's drive. "I am a history nerd," Smart explains. "And by buying chocolate frogs you get two things: chocolate (yay!) and you can learn a bit about a famous historical witch or wizard. So it's a win-win situation " "I collect them partially because it's addicting, partially because I like having lots of things in my Gringotts vault, and partially to try and get them all," Rowena says.
I continued the interview by inquiring about their favourite card. "I'd love my gold cards," Smart laughs. "IF I HAD ANY!" Angela cannot choose between Herpo The Foul and Albus Dumbledore. "Just because they're shiny and gold and rare," she explains. June also chooses Dumbledore's card, but for a different reason. "It reminds me of the first Harry Potter book, so I think it's so valuable for its nostalgia..." Rowena is the only one to pick a silver card. "I like them all, but my favorite is Cliodne. I don't know why, I just find the card very attractive!" Tessa, however, chooses a very common bronze card, Tilly Toke. "I love her name," she tells me.
It seems like all these collectors have one common goal: getting all 101 different cards. How do they feel about reaching that goal? "Maybe, in a few years..." Rowena shrugs. "Definitely not anytime soon." The others do have lots of confidence in themselves. "I am positive about it," June says. "I'm not sure if anyone has succeeded in it yet and if so how many, but I would be over the moon if I did it!" According to Tessa, this has not occurred yet. "But I'm sure someone will collect all of them soon if you all keep ordering so many frogs, " she adds. Smart puts on his cap and is definitely aiming to be the very best. "It will take a lot of time, and money, but I think one day I'll catch 'em all. Uhm, wrong franchise *facepalm* But you get what I want to say." "One day... dreams can come true. It just takes understanding of the chocolate frog card system, and enough dedication and money." Angela states.
A Chocolate Frog costs 5S each. How much have these young, determined collectors spend on them?
"Too much. Uhhh maybe around 30G?" Rowena guesses.
"Too much, yet not enough." Smart replies.
"I try not to think about it, because I know it's a lot," June admits.
Angela started calculating. "I've spent approximately 130G on Chocolate Frogs."
I did a quick calculation as well, excluding gifted ones except when ordered on a regular basis. Rowena's has 115 Frogs in her vault, and (should have) paid 33G 14S for them. She estimated quite well. Smart has ordered 280 Frogs, which means that he has spent 82G 6S. But June is the big spender. She has bought 590 Frogs for herself and 460 for me. That brings her to a total of 308G 14S.
However, we should not forget about our hard working Honeydukes Assistant. Tessa definitely deserves some extra credit for all her hard work! "At first I didn't really like processing Chocolate Frog orders," she says. "When I got hired, there were two months of orders. It was also right before Halloween 2016 and the Professors were all buying lots of Halloween candy, including Chocolate Frogs. It took me two full days to process everything. Processing everything else was okay, but I didn't like Chocolate Frogs because it takes so long. However, the more frogs I processed, the faster I could do it. I also loved processing orders for the regulars and that made it more fun." If you have not noticed, there was a short break in which Tessa was free from all the orders that were haunting her. Yet, she could not stay away from the little Hogsmeade shop. "I quit this job because I would be busy and I didn't want people to wait two weeks for their orders to be processed," she explains. "But then I got much more time. I noticed that lots of orders, especially Chocolate Frogs, weren't processed. After working at Honeydukes for so long, it kinda started feeling like my own shop at some point, so I didn't like seeing the amount of orders. I spend quite a lot of time at this shop now that I'm back, but it's worth it."
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